An X-Rated conversation with the Namby Pamby

The setting: my car

The occupants: me and the Namby Pamby

The scene: driving north from Downtown Chicago for a sushi dinner with the Alleged Lady, Grace, and the Dirty Hippie

Cue scene:

Artful and Namby are driving through Namby's old neighborhood on the way north. Artful is behind the wheel and Namby is commenting on the sights and sounds.

Namby: "This was where my Jewel (a local grocery store) used to be."

Artful (trying to be witty like Namby. but failing miserably): "The Jewel of the Nile?"

Namby: "Where is that from?"

Artful: "Umm..the movie? "The Jewel of the Nile"? Sequel to "Romancing the Stone"

Namby: "That's where it's from!"

Silence, as I try to come up with something more witty. Then...

Artful: "I think it is also the name of a porn star."

Namby (laughing loudly): "Artful, you really are knowledgeable about all films!"

Now, keep in mind that I have NEVER frequented an adult theater, but I continued on, driven by Namby's laughter.

Artful (emboldened by Namby's laughter and trying to make it continue): "Yessir-nothing beats a good nudie theater. I mean, the soft focus, the soft seats..."

Namby: "Premoistened, of course..."

Artful: "Of course! and all the free tissues that you need...everyone there for the same purpose, a brotherhood of sorts. One giant circle jerk."

Namby (shouting and laughing with glee): "HA!! CIRCLE JERK!"

When uttering the words, Namby failed to realize that 1) he was shouting, as he does often and 2) the windows and sunroof of the car were open. These realizations slowly dawned on him when he looked to his right after shouting "CIRCLE JERK" and saw a woman in a car with her windows open, looking at the two of us with open disgust and turning away as Namby waved his fingers to her and sheepishly said "Hi!"

Seriously, I cannot make this stuff up.